A Curse Or A Blessing

Copyright © 2013 Timothy S. Klugh. All Rights Reserved.

Is it a blessing or a curse to be who I am? I still have not figured that out yet, but over the last year it seems that the more strongly I have tried to pursue my dreams, the greater the trials have been. Many times I've questioned in my heart if I am doing the right thing in my life... because if pursuing my dreams is wrong, why is it that when I don't pursue them, an emptiness eats into my soul that makes me feel my life is out of balance? On the other hand, why does pursuing them fill the emptiness but brings a great amount of obstacles that seem as if (at times) bent to destroy my spirit? Sometimes I feel God doesn't even know what to do with me. Actually, I feel that more often than not. And to be honest, I would not blame Him if He did think that. However, I feel He does the best He can despite the troublesome obscurity that I am. He gave me an amazing wife who loves me beyond what would be thought possible or expected from a companion. She is an eternal soulmate, a best friend, and something even more that I do not think there is a word for. The only thing that could come close to filling those unknown words is that she is the miracle that everyday gives me new hope and strength of purpose. And God gave me a son of extraordinary talent and intellect who is wise beyond his years and aggressively speaks up for his family.

I have always strived to help others, especially those who have dreams of their own. If my own dreams can help their dreams, then I do what I can to fulfill a part of their dreams through my own dreams. Some people I help are very grateful for it, and I go out of my way to help them whenever I can. A few that I have helped became very arrogant in the process and stepped on me in the process. A few that I helped not only became arrogant but also became very resentful to me... for what?... for helping them? If they become too difficult to deal with, I have no choice but to let them go. Why they go angry, I will never quite understand. Some have tried to steal the reigns on my dreams, and that to me is like trying to kidnap my child. I do react accordingly as a protective parent with my dreams. I will share the dreams but not let the dreams be stolen away.

Coming up is my musical "Magick & Poison: The Musical", and it is filled with a lot of wonderfully talented people... all with great dreams of their own. I do hope that all my family, friends, and fellow artists come and see it. As for myself, having such support lets me know that I am on the correct path and that pursuing dreams is indeed the right thing to do with one's life.

Written on 10/15/2013
Revised on 05/26/2017
Revised on 05/27/2017

Page Range: 1 - 1